As a grown adult I have plenty of friendships with women, but as a teenager and into college I think every friendship had at least a little hint of something more. Or rather, I think I considered every young woman I interacted with through a lens of whether either she might be interested in me or I might be interested in her or both. In many cases it was easiest to be friends with women who were either not interested in me or I wasn't interested in her or she was in a relationship and unavailable. If a potential relationship was off the table, then I could be myself. The hard part was when we were both available and potentially interested in each other because then I had to read signals and decide if she really was interested before I declared my own interest. I'm glad I grew up. I think my teen self was wrong to look at young women that way. Society tells boys to be tough, and offers them one place to give and receive tenderness, which is a romantic relationship. I think boys are set up to have their radar up for someone who can give them what they are missing. But that is also a set-up for the girls. They can never fill the emotional holes caused by society - boys project all of their needs out onto them and then are surprised when girls turn out to be humans with their own needs. Ok. Well your essay got me thinking. Thanks.